My husband and I don't get a lot of time to talk with each other, more less go out on a date. He works the grave-yard shift and I'm busy teaching our children, running them back and forth to classes, sports practices, cooking, cleaning, etc. Needles to say we get about an hour of family time each day. So at the beginning of January I decided to "tell" him all the things I want him to know that I'm unable to share with him verbally. Here is what I've been doing.
Each day before the kids and I head out, I grab a whiteboard pen and write my husband a note on our bathroom mirror. This way, when he gets home from his long exhausting day of work he receives a Pick-Me-Up. I tell him how he is a great provider, a fantastic role model for our kids, a light in my dark days. I tell him what I love about his physical appearance, how his outer strength matches that of inner strength, that I appreciate what help he can offer me during the day. Anything and everything!
Something that surprised me while doing this for a couple of weeks was when he told me he was ready for a date night. I'm pretty sure my mouth dropped open and hung there for a few minutes. I can't recall the last time I heard him say that. It was truly a great surprise! Then just yesterday he came to me, gave me a big hug and said he needed to tell me something. This time my heart started racing because his tone of voice was one he uses when I'm about to be told I did something wrong. So I looked up at him, nervous of what I was about to hear.
"I need to tell you that I love coming home to your sweet notes every day. The first one was the best surprise, and the next one was great. On my way home from work now I start to wonder what you've written that day. I look forward to reading the notes. Honestly, when I don't get a new one on the weekends I'm disappointed. I know you can't carry this on for ever, but I wanted to let you know that it's really giving me a boost in every area of my life. Thank you."
Hello! The very reason I've been writing him notes is to give him the mental boost he needs. Studies have shown that men crave and desperately need to have their wives not just show, but TELL them they are appreciated and needed. Here is a quick article from Focus on the Family that talks about speaking words of praise to your spouse. My husband has told me in earlier years that he didn't know if he was doing enough for us or if I appreciated him. I make it a point to let him know the things I love about him because he needs to know and should know.
How do you let your spouse know you love and appreciate them? Do you leave notes? Call them throughout the day just to say "I love you!"? I'd love to hear!